My wife dances (grinds) guys and girls when drinking/dancing, but she recently lap danced a stranger? Why?

My wife and I like to go out with other couples/friends on occassions and have some adult beverages and dance. Keep in mind, my wife is somewhat conservative by nature and rarely dances unless drinking is involved. On a number of occassions I have found my wife making herself the somewhat center of attention with her girlfriends and/or the girls husbands or boyfriends, by dirty dancing, grinding, whatever you want to call. It has never gotten out of hand and everyone has a laugh and it is forgotten. But recently, she and I took a weekend trip out of town together. The first night was great staying in and doing the room service thing. The second afternoon we wandered into town, this was an unfamiliar new place that neither of us had ever been to. We stumbled into the local hot spot for nightlife. The evening and night proceeded and the bar turned into a nightclub. We got acquainted with some other folks that were seated by us and all began to drink together. Well, within one hour my wife was grinding with the two other girls on the dance floor. She then proceeded to straddle the lap of one of the boyfriends and lap dance him on the edge of the dance floor, where he was seated. This was a cool group and nothing happened as a result, although I realized I needed to get her out of there before anything did ie, pissed off girlfriend. What are peoples thoughts about a wife that makes herself the center of attention on these occassions. She is a beautiful gal with a very nice body and I am sure the guy at that bar/club would verify that! I lavish her with attention all the time and tell her how sexy she is and she acts like it embarrasses her and doesn't know how to react. We have been happily married for nearly twelve years and have a healthy sex life. I do not do this with other women, although I sometimes dance with other female friends on these occassions. So, it shouldn't be a ';well you rubbed all over her'; kind of reaction. I just want some peoples thoughts on this type of behavior.My wife dances (grinds) guys and girls when drinking/dancing, but she recently lap danced a stranger? Why?
I have a few questions in order to give you an intelligent opinion:



Does she drink on these occasions?

not that it is an excuse, but her activities lend themselves to that type of situation.



Is she ever remorseful, or even worse, defensive about the events?

this would indicate she either regrets an indiscretion, or is trying to rationalize them as ';not important';



Does she make sure you see her do it?

Perhaps she would be hinting at adding another person...



Does it end up with a bit more fire in the bedroom?

Maybe it's her way of being more aware of her sexuality



Does she shut down afterwards, not wanting any intimacy?

she may be revealing some dissatisfaction with your love-life,



have you ever encouraged her to ';grind'; you as well?

perhaps she is worried you don't like her overt sexuality, and opts to share it with others who don't object to it.



the latest was on a special trip?

did she want to let loose and create a memory



or perhaps she just gets wound up in the excitement and isn't thinking before she acts.



I don't see any Narcissism, although I am not privy to the exact incidents and the level of attention she is getting.



I would sit down with her and discuss what you love about her free-spirited ways, but that you hope she can make you her exclusive dance partner, and perhaps limit dirty dancing to private moments, or at least not in the center of a club

or

or hope she respects you enough to understand how uncomfortable it makes you feel when she engages others in that type of interaction.



Dancing is meant to be seductive, but perhaps overt sexual jestures take it a bit too far,



so long as there is no intent to stray, dancing fully clothed is better than having her steal away to be with someone else, but choose your situations carefully



the trip seems like a case of ';what happens in Vegas...(will not jeopardize any reputation back home)';



She was having a carefree weekend, and unless you worry about her fidelity, the occasional ';dirty weekend'; with you at least gives her a chance to get wild with you, instead of without you.



Women as they age often need to be reminded of their attractiveness, and you are a biased opinion in her mind, whereas others are public confirmation of her appeal....

your opinion counts, but she knows you find her attractive, she just needs to be sure others agree.... including her.My wife dances (grinds) guys and girls when drinking/dancing, but she recently lap danced a stranger? Why?
Yeah the looks are great...but would they like what they see well enough to approach her? that's attraction, the eye-candy reaction from guys is instinctual, sort of an ';all right God!!, good work';

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Your married dude so idk, but here is my opinion i know i would be pissed off if my girl done that. I dont mind if she dances with friends but grinding on another guy, I'd talk to her and see how she would feel if i've done that with another girl.
Getting married usually involves a vow of fidelity and her indiscretions violate that.



It is unacceptable behavior and it easily can be seen as hurtful to you.



It needs to stop and both of you need to accept that neither of you should ever put yourselves into situations where you may ever find yourself tempted to do anything that would be hurtful to your partner because you have sworn to love them. Your wife clearly needs counseling for her reckless behavior and so do you so that both of you learn what is acceptable and what isn't and how to deal with it and avoid anything that threatens your marriage.



Your marriage should be the most highly valued thing in both your lives.



Live every moment like it is and you may just count yourselves the luckiest people on Earth. Live otherwise and and it may turn out to be the worst hell you can ever imagine.